The Schoolhouse of Women

[Gosynhyll, Edward?]

STC 12104.5
Ringler 12104.5 and TP 1823. Authorship disputed, but attributed to Edwarde Gosynhyll in _The Prayse of All Women, Called Mulierum Pean_, (1542?) STC 12102 (A2). However, _Mulierum Pean_ is mentioned in the present work (A1v). According to STC, the present work is answered by STC 12102, 24601 (1542); if this is so, then both STC 12104.5 and STC 12102 must have existed in earlier versions, before 1541. Rpt. from STC 12107 (1572) by E. V. Utterson, ed., _Select Pieces of Early Popular Poetry_, 2 vols. (1817), 2:51-93; ed. from STC 12107 (1572) and STC 12105 (1560) by W. C. Hazlitt, _Remains of the Early Popular Poetry of England_, 4 vols. (1864-66), 4:97-146. UMI microfilm reel 423.

Here begynneth a lytle boke named the schole house of women
London: Thomas Petyt,1541.

Composition Date: 1541? [refers to _King Boccus_ at D3 (STC 3186, 1537?)].

trycke ='clever, neat'; see OED s.v. trick adj.1, 1. Tricky, q.v. OED, is first attested in 1786.fysnamye: =physiognomyMotyng: =Mooting, 'conversing'walke ='move, drive'; see OED s.v. walk v1, 3e (but here used transitively)extorte ='extortion, torture'; see OED s.v. extort n, where this example is citedshow[e]: letter brokendenture: an aphetic form of indenture; see OED s.v. denture n1secresye] secrye 1541
sig: [A1]
¶Here begynneth a lytle boke named the Schole-house of women: wherin euery man may rede a goodly prayse of the condicyons of women.
The yeare of our Lorde: M.D.XLj.
sig: [A1v]
THe prouerbe olde, who-so denyeth
I[n] my conceyte, doth greatly [e]rre In] Is 1541; erre] arre 1541
Both wyt & discrecyon yl he applyeth
That thynge of trueth, wold debar
5 Howbeit that folkes, presume so far
Wherby the truth, is often blamed
Yet in no wyse, trueth may be shamed

A foole of late, contryued a booke
And all in prayse, of the femynye
10 Who-so taketh labour, it to ouer-loke
Shall proue, all is but flatterye
Pehen he calleth it, it may well be 'Pehen' ('Peahen') is a punning reference to the title of Gosynhyll's 'Mulierum Paen'.
The Pecocke is proudest, of his fayre tayle
And so be all women of theyr apparayle

15 Wherfore as nowe, in this treatyse
What-so be sayde, in rude sentence
Uertue to encrease, & to laye vyce
I[s] chefe occasyon, of my pretence Is] In 1541
And where that trueth is none offence
20 Who-so therfore, that blameth me
I saye he demeth, wrongfully

Parchaunce the women, take displeasure
Bycause I rubbe them, on the gall
To them that good be peraduenture
25 It shall not be, materyall
The other sorte, no forse at all
Saye what they wyll, or bende the brewe brewe: =brow, but the spelling should be retained for the rhyme.
Them-selfe shall proue, my sayeng trewe

Eche other man, in generall
30 And namely those, that maryed be
Gyue euydent, testimonyall
Affermynge the same, yf I wolde lye
And thus reporte, that femynye
Ben euyll to please, and worse to truste
sig: A2
35 Crabbed and comberous, when them-selfe luste.

Haue tongue a[t] large, voyce loude & shryl at] ar 1541
Of wordes wonderous, passynge store
Stomake stoute, with frowarde wyll
And namely, when ye touche the sore
40 With one bare worde, or lytle more
They flusshe and flame, as hote as fyre
And swell as a tode, for feruent yre

And where they here, on worde that soundeth. on: =one
Lytle agaynst, theyr lewde behauour
45 And twyse so moche els, which that redoundeth
To theyr hye prayse, ye may be sure
So lyght of eare, they be and sowre
That of the better, they neuer recorde
The worse reherse they, worde by worde

50 It were moche hurte, for to dyscrye
The propertyes all, of the femynyne kynde
Howbeit a man may, coniecture nye
And saye also, as experience dothe bynde
That very fewe, there be to fynde
55 But that they can, how-soeuer the matter stande
Bere fyre and water, bothe in one hande

Euacyons they haue, fay[n]t and feble
Them to excuse, of duplycyte
As though they were inuencyble inuencyble: =invincible
60 Spotted, in any wyse to be
And with othes / so craftelye
They shalbe forgyd, on suche a grounde
As all-thyng were, bothe hole and sounde

And be it in ernyste, or els in iape
65 To them it is, one maner a thynge a: =of
Surely nought els, they after gape
But euermore, in commynge
To let a man of his sayenge
sig: [A2v]
Reason wyll, they not attende
70 But tell theyr owne tayle, to the ende

¶And for to say, moost commonlye
This vice, is appropryate to them all
For let a man, to them replye
In reasons, of matters small
75 These women be, so sensuall sensuall ='endowed with the faculty of sensation only, lacking in reason'; see OED s.v. sensual adj., 2
That b[e] theyr reason, not worth a torde be] by 1541
Yet wyll the woman / haue the laste worde

¶There may no reason, theyrs debarre
Nor none example, can them conuerte
80 They stody algate, to be at warre
And with euyll sawes, to be ouerthwarte
Malyce is so rote[d] / in theyr harte roted] roteth 1541
That seldome a man, may of them here
One good worde, in a hole longe yere

85 Albeit the nombre, of them are great
Yet doth theyr folye, farre excede
For all is fysshe, that commeth to net
In case that they, of theyr mynde spyde spyde: =spied?
Broche, rynge, clothe, or threde
90 Shame haue they none, to tere and snatche
All is theyr owne, that they may catche

¶What-so it be, they fynger ones
Of wedded man, or syngle playne
He may as soone, eate the adamunde stones adamunde: =adamant
95 As the selfe-same, of them to retayne
Moche they craue, and nought gyue agayne
As holesome for a man, is a womans corse
As a sholder of motton, for a sycke horse

¶And yet we may not, them longe mysse
100 For many sondry, commodytyes.
So [trycke a] way, they haue [t]o kysse trycke a] tryckey 1541; to] no 1541trycke ='clever, neat'; see OED s.v. trick adj.1, 1. Tricky, q.v. OED, is first attested in 1786.

With mouth, and rollynge eyes
sig: [A3]
Tongue to tongue, dysclose thyes thyes: =thighs?
One and other, commonlye
105 Haue in suche case, lyke propertye

That herde it were, in myne opynyon. herde: =hard
Yf god hym-selfe, wolde company kepe
But that wolde, brynge hym vpon
Wakynge, or other els a_slepe
110 Displease them ones, and then they wepe
By meane wherof, loue doth the cure
Yonge fooles to kepe / in longe vre

And whyles, the woyng-tyme doth last.
I meane with them, that maydens be
115 Lothe to dysplease, loue sure and fast
Axe what ye wyll, and spede maye ye Axe: =Ask
Fewe or none, for the moost partye
Gently entreatyd, deny you can
With her tables, to entre your man

120 That done they say, that ye dyd make.
Promesse to them, by good assuraunce
Them to mary, and to wyues take
Els had ye not, had suche dalyaunce
And all is for fere, of good vtteraunce
125 In case the bely, do not swell
They holde them pleased, and all is well

Yet must ye be, at ferther daunger
Yf ye do endende, to vse them ofte endende: =entende (intend), here and once below?
Kepe them bothe at racke, and maunger
130 Array them well, and lay them softe
Yet shall another man, come alofte
Haue you ones tourned, your eye and backe
Another she wyll haue, to smycke and smacke smycke ='kiss'? OED s.v. smick suggests that the term is probably a jingling modification of smack v2, 'kiss loudly'.

Perchaunce the bely, may ryse with-all.
135 Then wyll they swere, and stare apase
That thyne it is, when it dothe fall
sig: [A3v]
Be it [v]yla[yn-b]orne or base vylayn-borne] mylary, porne 1541
Loke they saye, on thyne owne face
Beholde well, bothe nose and eye
140 Nature it-selfe, the father wyll trye

And eyther there is, a synguler grace
Gyuen vnto babe, forth-on
Or sure it is, a meruaylous face
That god hath gyuen, vnto the man
145 For were they .xx. they muste eche one
Loke they strayght, eyther els a_shore a_shore ='with raised eyes'? An adv. ashore is not recorded in this sense in OED, but cf. OED s.v shore v1, 2
Be lyke the father, leest and moore

And when they are ones, waxen small
And able to ryde, or els to go
150 Unto lyke acte, agayne they fall
As who wolde say, they felte no wo
Yf ye renounce, kyndnes to sho
Then must ye sende them, to some straunge place
As good a mayde, as she before was

155 Then yf there come, a louer newe
And them apoynt, whether to come
They be lyke redy, vnto the mewe
And to be close, from wynde and sonne
With lytle labour, they are soone wonne
160 Not one I warrant you, amonges twentye
But she eftesones, wyll be as redye

Wed them ones, and then a_dewe
Fare-well all truste, and houswyfrye
Kepe theyr chambres, and them-selfe mewe
165 For staynynge, of theyr fys[na]mye fysnamye] fysmye 1541fysnamye: =physiognomy

And in theyr bed, all daye do lye
Must ones or twyse, euery weke
Feane them-selfe, for to be sycke

Sende for this, and sende for that
170 Lytle or nothyng, may them please
sig: [A4]
Come in good gossyp, and kepe me chat
I trust it shall, do me great ease
Complayne of many, a sondry dysease
A gossyps cuppe, bytwene, or twayne
175 Tyll she be gotten, vp agayne.

¶Then must she haue, maydens two or thre
That may then gossyps togyther brynge
Set them to labour, to blere the eye
Them-selfe wyll nother, wasshe ne wrynge
180 Bake ne brewe, nor other thyng
Syt by the fyre, let the maydens trotte
Brewe of the beste, in a halpeny potte

¶Playe who wyll, the man must labour
And brynge to house, all that he maye
185 The wyfe agayne, dothe nought but glauour glauour ='to talk plausibly and deceitfully; to flatter'; see OED s.v. glaver v, 2
And holde hym vp, with ye and naye
But of her cuppe / he shall not assaye
Other she sayeth, it is to thyne thyne: =thin
Other els ywis, there is nothynge in.

190 ¶And when these gossyps are ones mette.
Of euery tayle, and newe tidynge
They bable fast, and nothynge forget
They put (I warrant) betwene rydyng This line seems defective in sense.
This lerne the yonger, of the elders guydynge This: =Thus
195 Daye by day, kepynge suche scholes
The semple men, they make as fooles

¶Them-selfe alway, do make good chere
With one or other, they neuer reste
Our Iohan shall paye, that is not here
200 Howe say you gossyp, is it not beste
I beshrewe his herte / nowe is he bleste
He bet me gossyp, I maye tell you
That yet I am, bothe blacke and blewe

sig: [A4v]
Thus out it shall / what-so it be
205 Good or bad, all is one thynge
What-soeuer commeth, to memorye
Shall not be loste, for the tellinge
God wote they make, many a lesynge
Hit doth theyr stomake / greatly ease
210 To lerne what may / theyr husbandes displease.

¶The yonge complayneth vnto the olde
Somwhat to ease, theyr hertes therbye
The elder sayeth / good gossyp beholde
To shewe your mynde, hollye to me
215 Fere it not, ye knowe pardye
That I haue bene, bothe olde and yonge
Bothe close and sure / of tayle and tongue.

Then sayeth the yonger, I may tell you
I am so matchet, as no woman is matchet: =matched
220 Of all this nyght, tyll the cocke crewe
He wolde not ones, tourne me for to kysse
Euery nyght, he ryseth to pysse
And when he commeth / agayne vnwarme
Doth tourne his ars / in-to my barme

225 ¶Lappeth hym-selfe, rounde all aboute
And thrusteth me / out of my place
Leaueth me scantly, one ragge or cloute
To couer and cast, ouer my face
Full lytell maner / gossyp he hase
230 The moost vnkyndest, man haue I
That euer woman, layde her by

¶And be the daye, neuer so longe
He doth nothyng, but chyde and braull
Ye ye gossyppe, the more is my wronge
235 Hore and herlot, he doth me call
And byddes me gossyp, scrape and scrall scrape and scrall: an expression analogous to 'scrape and scratch', although OED does not record this sense s.v. scrawl
And for my liuyng, labour and swete
sig: B[1]
For as of hym, no peny I gette

I was a_curste, or els starke madde
240 And when I maryed, with hym vnwyse
I maye tell you, I myght haue had
Another maner of man, then he is
Yf I had folowed, my frendes aduyse
I shulde haue had, a mynyan
245 A man of lande, a gentylman

The deuyls gossyp, ought me a_shame
And payde I am nowe, euery penye
Wolde god he had, be blynde and lame
That daye and houre, he fyrst woed me
250 Ware not gossyp, these chyldren thre Ware: =Were
I wolde not tary, ye maye be sure
Longer with hym, daye ne houre

Then sayeth the elder, do as I do
Be sharpe and quycke, with hym agayne
255 Yf that he chyde, chyde you also
And for one worde, gyue you hym tway[n]e
Kepe hym shorte, and haue dysdayne
He shulde vse you, after suche rate
Byd hym be styll, with one euyll date

260 Cherysshe your-selfe, all that ye maye
And drawe vnto, good companye
Caste not your-selfe, gossyp awaye
Because he playeth, the churle with the
And by your wyll, kepe hym hungree
265 And byd hym go, when he wolde game
Unto his customers, god gyue hym shame customers ='associates, prostitutes'; see OED s.v. customer n, 4

Be euer with hym, at yea and naye
And by your wyll, begyn the warre
Yf he wolde smyte, then maye ye say
270 Go to hardely, yf thou so dare
I beshrewe thy herte, yf that thou spare
sig: [B1v]
All the world, shall wonder on the
Howe thou doest wreke, thy tene of me

Bycause thou hast be, at the dyse
275 And playde awaye, all that thou haste
Or from thy gylloutes, thou couldest not ryse gylloutes: =gillots, 'loose women'
Of all this day, ye sat so faste
And nowe god, gyue the shame at laste
Commest dronken home, with a myschefe
280 And woldest be reuenged, vpon thy wyfe

Better ywys, to holde thy hande
And more is, for thyne honestye
I had leuer thyne necke, [were] in a bande were] where 1541
Then I wolde take it, longe of the
285 Truste me, I wyll fynde remedye
Smyte and thou dare, I make god auowe
I wyll acquyte it, I wote well howe

In case there be, no remedy
But that ye must, haue strokes sadde
290 Take vp the babe / that then is nye
Be it wenche, or be it lad
And byd hym stryke, yf he be madde
Smyte hardely, and kyll thy sonne
And hange therfore, when thou hast done

295 Thus amonge, they kepe suche scholes
The yonge to drawe, after the olde
Motyng euer / vpon theyr stoles theyr] theyrs 1541Motyng: =Mooting, 'conversing'

Of euery matter, that they haue wolde
By meane wherof, the yonge waxe bolde
300 So that within, a moneth they be
Quarter-mayster, or more then he Quarter-mayster ='one who shares authority with another to the extent of a fourth', with a pun on quarter; see OED s.v. quartermaster n, 3

Truely some men, there be
That lyue alwaye, in great horrour
And saye it goeth, by destenye
305 To hange or wed, bothe hath one houre
sig: B2
And whyther it be, I am well sure
Hangynge is better, of the twayne
Sooner done, and shorter payne

¶On pylgrymage, then must they go
310 To wylesdon, barkyng, or some halowes
Perchaunce be forth, a nyght or two
On fote for werynge, of horse-showes
A vyage make, vnto the stewes
And neyther knele, to stones, ne stockes
315 But the offerynge take, with a quycke boxe

¶Somtyme also, lycence they craue
To be with some neyghbour, in the mydwyues stede
And all to the ende, some other knaue
Shall dubbe her husbande, a somer-byrde somer-byrde ='summer migrant', with allusion to the cuckoo; see OED s.v. summer bird
320 The trueth is so knowen, it can not be hyde
Albeit that fewe men, do hym here
The kucko, syngeth euery yere

¶They haue also another caste
In case the husbande, be present
325 The chylde I warrant, shalbe caste caste ='given birth to'; see OED s.v. cast v, 20b
And to her louer, therwith sent
The sylly man, none euyll ment
Regardeth lytell, or nothynge this
Howe by the babe, she sendes her kys

330 And for she wolde, b[e] rekened trewe be] by 1541
The matter to cloke, more craftely
Her kynsman call hym, I warrant you
And to blere, the husbandes eye
God wote the blynde / eateth many a flye
335 So doth the husband, often ywis
Father the chylde, that is not his

Trym them-selfe, euery daye newe
And in theyr glasses / poore and prye
Plat and plant, and theyr herys hewe hewe ='shape, fashion', or perhaps 'colour'; see OED s.v. hue v1. Plant ='place additions to the coiffure'?
sig: [B2v]
340 And all to make it, for the eye
The fynest ware, that they may bye
And all that euer / they may ymagyne
Is to enlure, the masculyne

Paynt them rounde, with many a pyn
345 Rynged for routyng, of pure golde Rynged for routyng ='(like) swine ringed through the nose to restrain them from rooting'; see OED s.vv. ring v1, 6a, rout v8
Fayre without, and foule within
And of theyr tayles / haue slypper holde
Bye who wyll / ware wyll be solde
Ye nede go [no] farther, the fayre is here no] 1541 omits
350 Bye when ye lyst / it lasteth ouer-yere

Spare for no cost / but drynke of the best.
And also of euery, deyntye eate
Hote in operation / and lyght to dygest
Nature to prouoke, and set on a heate
355 Oysters, kocles, and els-what they may yet
Nowe this, nowe that, & fayne them-selfe sycke
Suche thynges to receyue / as for theyr phisyck

By meane wherof, Tyresyas
Arbyter chose, the trueth to dyscus
360 Gyue iudgement playne, in this case
That the woman is: farre more lecherous
Gallus gallin[i]s, ter quinque sufficit vnus gallinis] gallinus 1541
Sed ter quinque viri / non sufficiunt mulieri For this proverb, see Hans Walther, 'Lateinische Sprichwšrter und Sentenzen des Mittelalters', #10153.

In case they wolde / ought of you craue.
365 Anone they wepe, and lowre a_pace
And say that they / can nothynge haue
Them to apparell, as other wyues hase
Truste not ouermoche, theyr mornynge face
Recorde ynough, of Samsons two wyues
370 Who foloweth theyr myndes / seldom-when thryues seldom-when ='rarely'

Albeit the byrder, with his blered eye
Dyssemble sorowe / with his sad face
Yet is there no byrde, he maye come by
sig: [B3]
By his engynes / that may haue grace
375 By women it foloweth / in semblable case
Wepe they or laugh they: all is one thynge
They deale mooste craftly, when they be wepyng

¶And yet amonge / who-so wyll thryue
And offyce bere, in towne or citye
380 Must nedes be ruled, by his wyfe
Or els in fay, it wyll not bye
The wyfe must able hym, to the degree
Able or vnable, lytle careth she
Bycause her-selfe, wolde honoured be

385 ¶Feare not she sayeth, vnto her spouse
A man or a mouse, whyther be ye
Shulde ye, your honesty refuse honesty] honestly 1541
And be as lyke, as other men be
In person, and in eche degre
390 Take it vpon you, do not refuse
And I myne owne selfe, fynde youre house

¶So by the meane, of her counsayle
The man may not, the offyce forsake
Bycause the wyfe, wolde haue a tayle tayle ='train of a dress'; see OED s.v. tail n1, 3
395 Come rakyng after, & a bonet blacke rakyng ='wandering, roaming'; see OED s.v. rake v2, 1b
A veluet heed, and also be take
With the best and not the worste
The man must be ruled: tyll all be in the dust.

¶Of all the dyseases, that euer wore.
400 Weddynge is nexte vnto the goute
A saulue there is, for euery sore saulue: =salve
To helpe a man within, or witho[u]t
But of these two, I am in dowte
No payne so feruent, hote ne colde
405 As is a man, to be called cockolde

¶And be neuer, so fearefull to fraye
So starke a cowarde, yet wyll he rage
sig: [B3v]
And drawe his knyfe, euen strayght-waye
Be he neuer so farre in [ae]ge aege] eage 1541
410 Call hym ones cockolde, and his corrage
Furthwith wyll kyndle, and force hym stryke
Worse then ye, named hym heretyke

And syeth there is, no salue therfore
Hit putteth many, a man in fere
415 To be infecte, with the selfe-same sore
Howe well so-euer, they them bere
Good taken haue they, also els-where
That whosoeuer weddeth a wyfe
Is sure of sorowe / all his lyfe

420 Of Socrates, the pacyent
Example good / of his wyues twayne
Whiche on a tyme / fell at dyssent
And vnto hym, dyd them complayne
He laught therat / and they agayne
425 Fall bothe on hym, with an euyll date
A pyspot they brake, vpon his pate

He helde hym pleased, and well content
The pysse ran downe / by his chekes twane
W[e]ll wyst I, sayde he, what it ment Well] Wyll 1541
430 And true it is, that all men fayne
That after thonder, commeth rayne
Who hath a wyfe, is sure to fynde
At home in his house, many a sowre wynde.

A certayne wyfe, sayde to me ones
435 I wolde thou knewe it, god made vs
Nother of earth, stocke ne stones
But of a thynge, moche precyous
Of a rybbe of a man, scrypture sayeth thus
Bycause the woman, in euery nede
440 Shulde be helpe to the man, in worde and dede

Man made of earth, and woman of man
sig: [B4]
As of a thynge, moost pryncypall
Whiche argueth well, sayeth she then
By iudgement iust, and reason naturall
445 That we be euer substantyall
And yet ye men, thus of us bable us] hus 1541
That women alwayes are varyable

Whiche thynge, as farre as I se can
Shulde be imployed, rather to you
450 Syth of the earth, god create man
And fygures therof, maketh euer newe
Nature thus naturate, me-semeth nowe
Must nedes, his fyrste orygynall
Ensewe, or be vnnaturall.

455 As ye saye (sayde I) helpe hym well
Euyll to thryue, and worse to fare
Who was the cause, that Adam fell
His wyfe or no? I make you ware
One and other, lytell ye care
460 So ye maye haue, that ye desyre
Though dun, and the packe, lye in the myre Though dun, and the packe ...: proverbial, see OED s.v. dun n1, 5

Made of a bone, ye sayd were ye
Truth it is, I can not denaye
Croked it was, styffe, and sturdye
465 And that wolde bende, no maner waye
Of nature lyke, I dare well saye,
Of that condicyon, all women be
Euyll to rule, bothe styffe, and sturdye

And ouer that, who lysteth to trye
470 Put me two bones, in a bagge
Or mo as it is, of quantyte
That done, holde it somwhat sagge
Shake it also, that it maye wagge
And ye shall here, none other matter
475 Of these bones, but clytter_clatter

sig: [B4v]
¶Lyke so of women, in felde and towne.
Assembled where, that many be
A man may heare them, by the sowne
Farther farre, then the eye maye se
480 Wherfore men saye / moost commenlye
Where many geese be, are many tordes
And where be women, are many wordes.

¶And so the husbande, is lyke to haue
A synguler treasure, of his wyfe
485 He nedeth neuer, an yll worde to craue
All the dayes, of his longe lyfe
Hath not that man, a prerogatyue
That may alwaye, of his wyfe haue
A thyng of nought, and it not craue

490 ¶And commonly, where cause is none
Some-thynge ymagyned is kepte in store
Whiche that she may, come the good-man home
With spedefull spiryte, lay hym before
Of lytle or nought, they make moche more
495 And be it true, or false they tell
All is sothed, as the gospell sothed ='proved to be true'; see OED s.v. soothe v, 1

¶And yet the rybbe, as I suppose
That god dyd take, out of the man
A dogge vp caught, and away gose
500 Eate it clene, so that as than
The werke to fynysshe, that god began
Coude not be, as we haue sayde
Bycause the dogge, the rybbe conuayde

¶A remedy, god founde as yet
505 Out of the dogge, he toke a rybbe
The woman forthwith he made of it
As to the man, neyther kynne nor sybbe
Nature she foloweth, and playeth the gyb
And at her husbande, doth barke and ball
sig: C[1]
510 As doth the curre, for nought at all

¶Another reason, yf ye marke well
Dothe cause the woman, of wordes be ryue
A certayne man, as fortune fell
A woman tongles, wedded to wyue
515 Whose fronyng countenaunce, perceyuyng belyue
Tyll he myght knowe, what men thought long
And wysshed full ofte, she had a tongue

¶The deuyll was redy, & appered anone
An aspen-leafe, he bad the man take
520 And in her mouth, shulde put but one
A tongue sayde the deuyll, it shall her make
Tyll he had done, his heed dyd ake
Leaues he gathered, and toke plentye
And in her mouthe / put two or thre

525 ¶Within a whyle, this medicyne wrought
The man coulde tary, no longer tyme
But wakened her, to the ende he mought
The vertue proue, of the medicyne
The fyrst worde, she spake to hym
530 She sayde thou horson, knaue, and thefe
Howe durst thou waken me, with a mischefe

¶From that day forwarde, she neuer ceassed
Her boyster babell, greuyd hym sore boyster: not recorded in OED, but cf. OED s.vv. boistous, boisterous, boistly, boisterly, boistness
The deuyll he met, and hym intreated
535 To make her tongles, as she was before
Not so sayde the deuyll, I wyll medle no more
I deuyll, a woman to speake maye constrayne
But all that in hell be, can not let it agayne

¶And by profe, dayly we se
540 What inclynacyon nature maketh
The aspyn-lefe, hangynge where it be
With lytle wynde, or none it shaketh
A womans tongue, in lyke-wyse taketh
sig: [C1v]
Lytle ease, and lytle rest
545 For yf it shulde, the herte wolde brest

Loke when the see, doth water want
Nor no wynde bloweth, [the] mylne [to] walke the mylne to walke] to mylne the walke 1541walke ='move, drive'; see OED s.v. walk v1, 3e (but here used transitively)

When Ethna hyll, of fyre is scant
The crowne whyte, and blacke is chalke
550 Then women cease, wyll of theyr talke
It is lyke appropryed, all women to bable
As dogges to barke, and geese to gagle

And that more is, all men do saye
That woman to man, is moost comforte
555 Howbeit they meane it, another waye
And saye she is, mannes vtter e[x]torte extorte] ertorte 1541extorte ='extortion, torture'; see OED s.v. extort n, where this example is cited

And ouer that, by iust reporte
The smaller pease, the mo to the pot
The fayrer woman, the more gyllot

560 The fayrer of face, the [p]rouder of harte prouder] brouder 1541
The lother to woo, the sooner won
The lesse of speche, the more ouerthwart
Not one so daungerous, as is dame dun
The fouler she is, the sooner it is done
565 So shorte of hele / they be ouer-all
That and yf ye blowe / they must nedes fall

By meane wherof, all men reporte
And saye that women, can not be stable
For be one gone, and other resorte
570 And profereth them, thyng seruysable
Our fyly is fetlyd, vnto the sadle fetlyd ='groomed'; see OED s.v. fettle v, 1
Ryde who wyll, shod is our mare
And thus they eschaunge, ware for ware

In case thou woldest, not haue it so
575 But rather to fynde / euery-thynge well
I counseyle the before thou go
Forth of towne, to crowche and knele
sig: C2
And offre a candell, to the deuyll
Parcase thy wyfe wolde, be so lewed
580 He wolde for_let it, all beshrewed

Example therof, and that was this.
A certayne man, from home shulde ryde
Whiche fearyng his wyfe, wolde do amys
To an ymage of Sathan, vpon a wall-syde
585 Offered a candell, and that was espyde
And sayde syr Sathan, nowe I charge the
My wyfe in myne absence, thou do ouer-se

His iourney ended, came home agayne
And the selfe ymage, went streyght vnto
590 The deuyll hym shewed, euery-thyng playne
Howe he had let, that shulde haue be do
And from her bacwarde, drawen one or two
The daungerest cure, that euer he had daungerest: =most dangerous, 'most difficult'
Was to kepe good, that wolde haue ben bad

595 Another thyng as pryncypall
Be not with her, in Ialosye
What mysaduenture, so-euer befall
Forbyd her no mannes company
Nor yet rebuke her / syngulerly
600 In case thou do, though thou haddest sworne
A blaste shalt thou blowe, in Nynerus horne

For as we se, by experyence
Euery day before our eye
And by reporte of men of credence
605 For the moost parte / the femynye
By theyr innatyue, destynye
Fyrst and formest, when they be chyd
Wyll that thynge do, they be forbyd

And ouer that, thy wyfe present
610 I counseyle the, be wyse and ware
Thou prayse, no other mans instrument
sig: [C2v]
Better then thyne owne, berynge ware
For yf thou do, she wyll not spare
Were he neuer, so naturall a foole
615 Tyll she haue assayed, the selfe-same tole

So frayle they be, of disposycyon
So croked, so crabbed, with that so yll.
So lewed, so shrewed, lyght of condicyon
That sure, it were vnpossyble
620 To let them, of theyr owne selfe-wyll
And but it come, of theyr owne mynde
A man were as good, throwe stones at the wynde

Saye what ye wyll, they wyll do as them lust
The profe therof, in a certayne fable
625 A husbande-man, hauyng good truste
His wyfe to hym, had be agreable
Thought to attempt / yf she had be reformable
Bad take the potte, that sod ouer the fyre sod: =seethed
And set it aboue, vpon the astyre astyre ='hearth'; see OED s.vv. astre, easter n2

630 She a[n]swered hym, I holde the mad answered] aswered 1541
And I more foole, by saynt Martyne
The dyner is redy, as thou me bad
And tyme it were that thou shuldest dyne
And thou wylte not, I wyll go to myne
635 I byd the sayde he, bere vp the potte
A_ha she sayde, I trowe thou dote

Up she goeth, for feare at laste
No questyon moued, where it shulde stande
Upon his heade, the potage she cast
640 And helde the potte, styll in her hande
And towardes hym, she curst and bande bande: =banned, 'cursed'
Sayd and sware, he myght her truste
She wolde with the potage, do what her luste

No remedy, to dyscontent.
645 To tratle to them, of reason or lawe tratle ='chatter'; see OED s.v. trattle
sig: [C3]
For be a womans, purpose bent
Nothyng preualeth, to withdrawe
Nor yet to kepe / them vnder awe
Gyue them counsayle, the best ye can
650 They wyll folowe theyr owne wyll, now & than

Loke of discrecyon, fewe womanly
And to the were few, profytable
Not thre I dare saye, amonge thyrtye
That be dyscrete, and reasonable
655 And yet alwayes, they byble_bable
Of euery matter, and make it nyse
And in conclusyon, be wonderous peuysshe

As holy as sayntes, in churche they be
And in strete, as aungels they were
660 At home, for all theyr ypocrysye
A deuylysshe lyfe, they led all the yere
When lenton cometh, then to the frere
The frere-lymlyfter, for a payre of pense
Wyll for all causes, with them dyspense

665 And that more is, I dare auowe
That yf thy wyfe, dyspleasure take
Be it ryght or wronge, yet thou
Must nedes of forse, for thy wyues sake
Fyght and fraye, and hye wordes crake
670 Swere and stare, as who wolde saye
Thou woldest not let, to kyll and slaye

In case thou take the matter lyght
As man of peas, loue and concorde
Then wyll she wepe, anone forth-ryght
675 And gyue the many, an euyll worde
And byd the gyrde, to the thy sworde
And saye, yf I had maryed a man
This thynge shulde not, be longe vndone

sig: [C3v]
¶Recorde, the wycked Iesabell.
680 Whiche wolde haue slayne / good Helyas
Recorde also of the gospell
The wyfe of Phylyp / Herodyas
Whiche through her doughter, brought to pas
That Herode her graunted, or that they wyste
685 To gyue her the heed / of Iohan_Baptyst

Thus [they] them-selfe, may lytle do they] were 1541
As in regarde of corporall myght
Of cruelnes they rest not so
But stere theyr husbandes, for to fyght
690 The prouerbe olde, accordeth ryght
Women and dogges, causeth moche stryfe
And moost occasyons, to be myschefe

¶In case that thou, so foolysshe be
For thy wyues wordes, to make a brall
695 Yf it so fortune, that she do it see
Regardeth lytle, what may befall
The fyrst thyng, that she doth of all
On the she runneth, and holdeth the styll
Whyles that an-other, may the kyll

700 And yf it chaunce, any vnkynde worde
Escape thy mouthe, wherby that ye
Bywtene your-selfe / fall at dyscorde
Truste me well / in case that she
By any meane / may mayster the
705 For the moost parte, all women be
In suche case, all without pytye

¶Weake and feble, albeit they be
Of body / moche impotent
Example dayly, yet maye ye se
710 Comberous they be, and malyuolente
Harmeles creatures, none euyll mente
The vpper hande, yf they ones get
sig: [C4]
Can no more harme, then a mer[m]eset a mermeset] amerseset 1541

Who was so busye, as was the mayde.
715 With croked language, Peter to appose
Ones, twyse, or thryse, to hym she sayde
And thou felow, arte one of those
The trueth sayde she / thy language showse
Peter abasshed, swore and denayde
720 And all by reason, of the lewde mayde

Some men theyr be also, that saye
Be she syngule, or be she wedde
To moche she coueyteth, of chambre-playe
As dyd Byblis, the thynge forbed
725 Presume to be, in her mother stede
Myrrha also, inordynatelye
With her owne father, founde meanes to lye

The doughters twayne, of Loth the sage.
Hauynge lyke tykle, in theyr tayle
730 Coulde not refrayne, theyr wylfull rage
To satisfye, with euyll hayle
Theyr father fested, with costly vytayle
Made hym dronke, and so at laste
Medled with hym, he slepynge faste

735 Examples hereof, dyuers there be
To approue my sayenge, strayght as a lyne
As fyrst of the, abhomynable Pasyphe
And then the insacyat myssalyne
Pyrra, Fabulla, and fayre Helyne
740 With other thousandes, many mo
Whiche all to recyte, wolde neuer be do

I pray you, why was Adam shent.
Bycause he onely, dyd transgresse
Eue hym meuyd, fyrst to consent
745 To eate of the apple, she dyd hym dresse
So all came, of her wylfulnesse
sig: [C4v]
And syth that woman, that offyce began
She is more to blame then is the man the man] then man 1541

The wyfe of loth, wyllynge also
750 The wyll of god, to preuarycate
Out of the citye, when she shulde go
Loked behynde her, in her gate
To se by profe, the pronostycate pronostycate: =prognosticate, 'sign or token of some future event'
Displeased god, and she anone
755 Transfourmed was, in-to a salte stone

I pray you, what dyd quene atthalye
Loke in Paralypomenon
Mother of yonge kynge Othozye
Of all, and of all, the wylfullest one
760 Moued the kynge foresayde, her son
To do moche euyll, especyallye
The temple of god, for to dystroye

Myghty Samson, two wyues had
The fyrst a Philistian, by generacyon
765 Neyther of them good, but passynge bad
And false to hym, farre out of fasshyon
The fyrst hym caused, by lacrymacyon
His probleme to her, so that he sayde hym caused ... he sayde ='by weeping, induced him to reveal to her the solution to his riddle'
When she it knewe, she hym betrayde

770 The seconde delte moche worse then so
Deceyuynge hym, as ye shall heare
For she his strength / dyd take hym fro
In her lappe slepyng, she clypte his heere
Betrayed her lorde, and her bewpere
775 Thus Daly[l]a, for mede hym serued Dalyla] Dalyda 1541
And caused his eyes out to be carued

The wyfe of Iob, the man electe
Saluted hym with scornes and mockes
And full vnsemely, ofte hym checte
780 Sayeng thou foule, full of the pockes
sig: D[1]
Full lyke a foole, thy brest thou knockes
Wenest thou, for thy fayre speche
God wyll come, the for to seche

Thy pratynge leue, fowle the befall
785 Trust me, he wyll the neuer hele
Thy beestes / thy goodes, and thy chyldren all
Be deed and brente, nowe euery-dele
And thou lyest here, with many a byle byle: =boil
Pratynge, and prayenge, to the diuyne
790 And worse then thou stynkest, then a deed swyne

Lykewyse the wyfe, of olde Thoby
Whose name, as I remembre was Anne
Whiche hym entratyd, bosteously
With sad rebukes, nowe and than
795 Called hym dryuyll, and wytles fanne fanne =weather-cock (?), by confusion of fan with fane, vane; see OED s.v. fan n1, 8
Because he gaue / with herte so lyberall
Parte of his goodes, to the porall

The wanton wyfe, of kynge Pharao
Ioseph adhortyd / with her to lye
800 In place secrete, betwene them two
God forbyd madame sayde he
Bycause she sawe, it wolde not be
A shamefull lye she dyd inuent
In pryson to caste / that innocent

805 In women all, this propertye
Is knowen sure, and manyfeste
That yf a man, maye come so nye
To shewe them game, that they loue beste
And wyll not do it, then well they Ieste well: =will
810 But trust me sure, that with the harte
They wyll neuer loue hym afterwarte afterwarte: a nonce-spelling of afterward

The wyse man sayeth, in his prouerbes
A strumpettes lyppes are dulce as honye
But in her dealynge, she is sowre as herbes
sig: [D1v]
815 Wormewode, or rewe, or worse sayeth he
For when them lyketh, to mocke with the
With tongue & eye, suche semblaunce the[y] show[e] they] the 1541show[e]: letter broken

That harde it were them to mystrowe

¶As though they spake, with mouth & herte
820 With face they make, so good semblaunce
That harde it were, a man to starte
From theyr fayre glosynge, countenaunce
Thus with theyr sugered, vtteraunce
The symple men / that meane but iust
825 Disceyued are, where they moost trust

¶In case they do you, but one benefyte
An hundreth tymes by you recompensed
They wyll you euer, with that one entwyte
With lytle cause, or none offensed offensed ='offended'
830 All your demerytes, shalbe vnrecensed demerytes ='merits'; see OED s.v. demerit n, 1. Vnrecensed ='unenumerated'; see OED s.v. recense v
So be it lesse, or be it more
All is loste, ye gaue them before

Yf ye renounce, your copy-holde
And wolde be tenaunt, by Indenture
835 There is no ware, then to be solde
Ye must go seke, at your aduenture
For as of you, they haue no denture denture] deynture 1541denture: an aphetic form of indenture; see OED s.v. denture n1

Thynke ye that I, wyll be so redy
Nay by Iesse, I holde you a peny

840 And then yf ye, no labour make
Ye maye be sure that then wyll she
The lure out-throwe, the hawke to take
Be_lyke, of her affinyte
Good god howe straunge, nowe-adayes be ye
845 I wolde haue thought, ye had ben none suche
But by the lytell, is knowen the moche

So at length, by howche or by crowche. by howche or by crowche: =by hook or by crook; see OED s.v. hook n1, 14
Lesse or more, euer they craue
sig: D2
Untyll the hande, be in the pouche
850 No wordes prouaylen, the to saue prouaylen: =prevail
A thousande thousande wayes they haue
To make a man, a threde-bare cote
And leue hym, neyther peny ne grote

Nowe this nowe that, they craue alway
855 One thynge or other, they neuer rest
Saye what ye wyll, they wyll no naye
Nor none excuse, but theyr owne request
So they may be trymmed, and fed of the best
They haue no remorse, who bereth the name name ='reputation'; see OED s.v. name n, 6d
860 Nor whome they put to open shame

The trueth is knowe[n] as in this case
By holy wryte, autenticate
Betwene Thamer, and the iudge Iudas
The booke called Genesis, examynate
865 Howe thamar the wydowe, in the waye sate
D[y]sgysed her-selfe, in straunge araye D[y]sgysed: letter broken
Iudas to dysceyue, after that waye.

Her fresshe atyre, & countenaunce therto
Prouoked this man, a questyon to make
870 She lyghtly consentynge, as some other do
Sayde what wylt thou gyue, thy pleasure to take
Some pledge she sayde, for promyse is slake
Of hym she requyred, staffe mantell and rynge
His mynde to folowe, and do the thynge

875 Shorte tayle to make, the lawe was then
A woman that founde was, in auoutrye
Dewe proffe alledge, by credyble men
Shulde suffre death, saunce remedy
The matter apperyd, by her bely
880 She openly sayde, in sclaunder of Iudas
Who oweth these thre, this dede done has

sig: [D2v]
¶Thus be they all, past shame and drede.
And careth not, who doth byd them bayle
With goostly sentence, them to fede
885 Lytell or nothynge, dothe them preuayle
Be the backe tourned, anone they rayle
And say, for all your counseyle good
Ye had leuer a bare ars, then a furred hood.

¶To say that they can, counseyle kepe.
890 It were to me, a meruaylous thynge
Onlesse it be, when they do slepe
Or no-body, to gyue the[m] hearynge them] the 1541
Desyrous euer, of newe tydynge
And were it matter, of lymme and lyfe
895 Out it shall, be tolde byleue

Tully the Roman, vpon a daye
Though[t] to approue, his wyfe secr[es]ye Thought] Though 1541secresye] secrye 1541

In counseyle tolde her, he had put awaye
The Emperour sonne, to the ende that we
900 Maye reygne and rule, bothe lande and see
Glad was she, and yet she went
And hym dysclosed, incontynent

Tully escaped, harde with the lyfe.
And all by meane / of his owne folye
905 Had not the trueth, be knowen belyue
To haue be hanged / it was ieoperdye
Be it therfore true tale, or lye
Be wyse and ware, wake ye or wynke
And tell not your wyfe, all that ye thynke

910 kynge Salomon, bothe wyttye & wyse
A woman doth, assymylate
Unto a droppynge, euesynge guyse euesynge: =eavesing, 'eaves, roof'
Dystyllynge downe, after rayne late
Who[se] droppes vnclene, doth maculate Whose] Who 1541
915 The fynest vesture, that any man werys
sig: [D3]
With colde and wete, the body derys

Euyn so a woman / litygyous
Disquieteth, a hole householde
And who-so he be, that in his house
920 Entendeth to kepe, a woman skolde
The wynde that bloweth, bothe moyst & colde
Were better farre, for to her[b]our herbour] herpour 1541
And lesse shulde fynde, of dyspleasure

Enuyous they be, it is dayly sene
925 And proude also, of comparyson
Recorde of Saba, the gorgyous quene
Before, nor syns, was neuer suche one
Bycause she enuyed, kynge Salomon
To proue his wysdome, and take with a tryppe take with a tryppe ='detect in an error'; see OED s.v. trip n1, 8
930 Passed the sees, in a meruaylous shyppe

Bycause that Naboth, wolde not sell
Unto the kynge, of Samarye
The vyneyarde he had, at Israell
Achab the kynge, became angrye
935 As soone as Iesubell, the quene knewe why
She straytly commaunded by wrytynge to fayne
Some cryme vpon Naboth, & so was he slayne

Loke and rede, the boke Bockas
And ye shall fynde, many a reason
940 The pryde of women, to deface
For theyr m[y]slyuynge, in theyr season m[y]slyuynge: letter illegible
Good women he wrote, were very geson
As ye shall fynde of ,xi[x]. he wrote ,xi[x].: letter illegible
But of the .xx. neyther letter nor iote

945 Salamon sayeth, thre thynges there be
Seldome, or neuer saturate saturate ='satisfied, satiated'
Hell the fyrst, is of the thre
The seconde, a womans water-gate
The grounde of water / insacyate
sig: [D3v]
950 Of euery lewde fassyon, recken who can
And euer I warrant, the woman is one.

¶Harde to be knowen, lyke membre ther be
The fourth to knowe, who is he con
The fyrst whiche waye, a byrde wyll flee
955 Or of a serpent, sprent from a stone
What hauen a shyppe, shal be dryue vpon
The crafte of a hore, perceyue who con
And euer I warrant the woman is one

¶The grounde also / doth vary by thre
960 The fourth may not, be stablysshed sure
A bonde-man set, in maiestye
A foole fed fatte, whyles he wyll in powre
An odyous woman, in weddynge vre
An heyre made of, a bonde-woman
965 So euer I warrant, the woman is one.

¶Whiche thynges remembred, well-nere eche man
Reporte of them, accordyngly
And saye playnly, that in the woman
Is lytle thynge, of prayse worthye
970 Lettred or vnlerned, whether they be
They say of all creatures, women are the best
Cuius contrarium, verum est

¶And were not, two small venyalles venyalles ='venial sins'
The femynyne myght, be gloryfyde
975 Set in thrones perpetualles
And as the goddes, be deyfyde
Two venyall synnes, they ha[u]e and hyde
None of the seuen, theyr names who can tell
They can neyther do, nor saye well

980 ¶So to conclude, of this treatyse
A fynall ende, rude though it be
The processe through, who wyll superuyse
Shall well perceyue, I make no lye
sig: [D4]
An ende therfore, to make shortlye
985 In my conceyte / he lyueth in rest
That medleth with them, of all people leest.

Go forth lytell booke, be not afrayde
To be accepte, with them that are wyse
And shewe them playne, what-so be sayde
In any parte of this treatyse
5 Doth not dystayne, theyr honestyse honestyse: =honesties?
But for the lewde, myght haue a myrrour
Hereby to amende, theyr damnable errour

Lyke as the preacher, doth dyscommende.
All vycyous liuynge, with mouth and wyll
10 Or as the mynstryll, doth endend
With helpe of lute, fynger or quyll
Example shewyng, to conuerte the yll
Lyke so myne auctour, dothe the same
No creature lyuynge, spoken be name be: =by

15 Percase any-one, dyspleasure take
Bycause it toucheth, her properlye
In case that she / suche wayes forsake
Whiche moste accorde, to her propertye
She nedeth not, herewith to be angrye
20 God graunt vs all, we may do this
Euery man to amende one, in that is amys

The good alwayes / wyll be content
With that, that is spoken / in generall
There wyll none / so soone be dyscontent
25 As they that fretesyd, be with-all fretesyd ='chilled, benumbed', with special reference to a horse's feet; see OED s.v. fretish, fretize
Rub a scalde horse / vpon the gall
And he wyll byte, wynse, and vente vente ='urinate, groan'? See OED s.v. vent v2, 2b, 3a
So wyll all people, that are malyuolent.

sig: [D4v]
Go forthe therfore, amonge the thycke
30 And bere in mynde, who is with the
The wordes that Salamon, and Dauid speake
In Iudicium, and in Genesye
Hierome, Iuuenall, and olde Thobie
Cathon, and Ouyd, wyll testyfye testyfye] testyfyue 1541
35 And Marcyall also, who lysteth to trye.

And vnto them, that lerned be
I wolde, and wyll, thou mekely went
And shewe them, who-so made the
Nothynge purposed, of yll intent
40 That shulde prohybyte the sacrament
But that the masculyne, myght hereby
Haue somwhat to ieste, with the feminy

¶Prynted at London in Paules Churche-yearde / at the sygne of the maydens heed, by Thomas_Petyt .M.D.[XL]j. .M.D.XLj.] .M.D.LXj. 1541