Elynour Rummynge

sig: [C5v]

ref.ed: 214

Here-after foloweth the boke called Elynour Rummynge .

sig: [C6]

¶The tunnyng of Elynour Rummyng. Per Skelton Laureat.

TEll you I chyll

If that ye wyll

A whyle be styll

Of a comely gyll

That dwelt on a hyll

But she is not gryll

For she is somwhat sage

And well worne in age

For her vysage

It woldt a ####ab#### swage

A mannes courage

¶Her lothely lere

Is nothynge clere

But vgly of chere

Droupy and drowsy

Scuruy and lowsy

ref.ed: 215

Her face all bowsy

Comely crynklyd

Woundersly wrynklyd

Lyke a rost pygges-eare

Brystled with here

¶Her lewde lyppes twayne

They slauer men sayne

Lyke a ropy rayne

A gummy glayre

sig: [C6v]

She is vgly fayre

Her nose somdele hoked

And camously croked

Neuer stoppynge

But euer droppynge

Her skynne lose and slacke

Greuyned lyke a sacke Greuyned] Grained D, M

With a croked backe

¶Her eyen gowndy

Are full vnsowndy

For they are blered

And she gray-hered

Iawed lyke a Ietty

A man wolde haue pytty

To se howe she is gumbed

Fyngered and thumbed

Gently Ioynted

Gresed and anoynted

Up to the knockles

The bones [of] her huckels of] L, K, D, M omit; huckels] buckels D, M

Lyke as they were with buckels Lyke as they were with buckels] D, M omit

Togyder made fast

Her youth is farre past

Foted lyke a plane

Legge[d] lyke a crane Legged] Legges L, K, D, M

And yet she wyll iet

Lyke a Ioyly fet

In her furred flocket

And graye russet rocket

With symper-the-cocket

Her huke of Lyncole-grene

sig: [C7]

It had ben hers I wene

ref.ed: 216

More then fourty yere

And so doth it apere doth it] it dothe D, M

For the grene bare thredes For] And D, M

Loke lyke sere wedes

Wyddered lyke hay

The woll wor[n]e away

And yet I dare saye

She thynketh her-selfe gaye

Upon the holy-daye

Whan she doth her aray

And gyrdeth in her gytes

Stytched and pranked with pletes

Her kyrtell Brystowe-red

With clothes vpon her hed

That wey a sowe of led That wey] That they wey K, D, M

Wrythen in wonder wyse in] in a D, M

After the sarasyns gyse

With a whym-wham

Knyt with a trym-tram

Upon her brayne-pan

Lyke an Egypcyan

Lapped about Lapped] Capped K, D, M

Whan she goeth out

Her-selfe for to shewe

She dryueth downe the dewe

With a payre of heles

As brode as two wheles

She hobles as she gose she gose] a gose D, M

With her blanket hose

Ouer the falowe

sig: [C7v]

Her shone smered wyth talowe

Gresed vpon dyrt

That baudeth her skyrt

Primus passus

¶And this comely dame

I vnder ####ab#### stande her name

Is Elynour Rummynge

At home in her wonnynge

And as men say

ref.ed: 217

She dwelt in Sothray

In a certayne stede

Bysyde Lederhede

She is a tonnysh gyb

100

The deuyll and she be syb.

¶But to m[a]ke vp my tale make] mke L

She breweth noppy ale

And maketh there-of port-sale port-sale] pore sale K, D

To trauellars / to tynkers

105

To sweters / to swynkers

And all good ale-drynkers

That wyll nothynge spare

But drynke tyll they stare

And brynge them-selfe bare

110

With now away the mare

And let vs sley care

As wyse as an hare

¶Come who-so wyll

To Elynoure on the hyll

115

With fyll the cup fyll

And syt there by styll

Erly and late

sig: [C8]

Thyther cometh Kate

Cysly and Sare

120

With theyr legges bare

And also theyr fete

Hardely full vnswete

With theyr heles dagged

Theyr kyrtelles all to ####ab#### iagged

125

Theyr smockes all to ####ab#### ragged

Wyth tytters and tatters

Brynge dysshes and platters

With all theyr myght runnynge

To Elynour Rummynge

130

To haue of her tunnynge

She leneth them on the same on] of D, M

And thus begynneth the game

Some wenches come vnlased vnlased] vnbrased D, M

Some huswyues come vnbrased Some huswyues come vnbrased] D, M omit

135

Wyth theyr naked pappes

That flyppes and flapp[e]s flappes] flapprs L

ref.ed: 218

It wygges and it wagges

Lyke tawny saffron-bagges

A sorte of foule drabbes

140

All scuruy with scabbes

Some be flybytten

Some skewed as a kytten

Some with a sho-clout

Bynde theyr heddes a ####ab#### bout

145

Some haue no herelace

Theyr lockes aboute theyr face

Theyr tresses vntrust

All full of vnlust

sig: [C8v]

Some loke strawry

150

Some cawry-mawry

Full vntydy tegges

Lyke rotten egges

Suche a lewde sorte

To Elynour resorte

155

From tyde to tyde

A ####ab#### byde a ####ab#### byde

And to you shall be tolde

Howe hyr ale is solde

To mawte and to molde

Secundus passus.

160

Some haue no mony

That thyder commy

For theyr ale to pay

That is a shreud aray

Elynour swered nay

165

Ye shall not bere awaye

Myne ale for nought Myne] My K, D, M

By hym that me bought

¶With hey dogge hay

Haue these hogges away hogges] dogges D, M

170

With get me a staffe

The swyne eate my draffe

Stryke the hogges with a clubbe

They haue dronke vp my swyllyng-tubbe

For be there neuer so moche prese

175

These swyne go to the hye dese

ref.ed: 219

The sowe with her pygges

The bore his tayle wrygges

His rumpe also he frygges

sig: D[1]

Agaynst the hye benche

180

With fo / ther is a stenche

Gather vp thou wenche

Seest thou not what is fall

Take vp dyrt and all dyrt] drit K, D, M

And bere out of the hall

185

God gyue it yll preuynge

Clenly as yuell cheuynge

But let vs turne playne

There we lefte agayne

For as yll a patch as that

190

The hennes ron in the mashfat

For they go to roust

Streyght ouer the ale-Ioust

And donge whan it commes

In the ale-tunnes

195

Than Elynour taketh

The mashe-bolle and shaketh

The hennes donge awaye

And skommeth it into a tray into] in D, M

Where-as the yeest is

200

With her maungy fystis

And somtyme she blennes

The donge of her hennes

And the ale togyder

And sayth gossyp come hyder

205

This ale shalbe thycker

And floure the more quycker

For I may tell you

I lerned it of a Iewe

Whan I began to brewe

sig: [D1v]

210

And I haue found it trew

Drinke now whyle it is new

And ye may it broke

It shall make you loke

Yonger than ye be

215

Yeres two or thre

For ye may proue it by me

ref.ed: 220

Behold she sayd and se

How bright I am of ble

Ich am not cast away

220

That can my husband say

Whan we kys and play

In lust and in lykyng

He calleth me his whytyng

His mullyng and his [m]ytyng mytyng] nytyng L, nyting K, nittinge D, nittine M

225

His nobbes and his conny

His swetyng and his honny

With bas my prety bonny

Thou art worth good and monny

This make I my falyre fonny

230

Tyll that he dreme and dronny

For after all our sport

Than wyll he rout and s[n]ort

Than swetely togither we ly Than swetely] Thus swete X

As two pygges in a sty.

235

¶To cease me semeth best

And of this tale to rest

And for to leue this letter

Bicause it is no better

And bicause it is no swetter

240

We wyll no farther ryme

sig: D2

Of it / at this tyme

But we wyll turne playne

Where we left agayne

Tertius passus

¶In-stede of coyne and monny

245

Some brynge her a conny

And some a pot with honny

Some a salt / and some a spone

Some their hose some their shon[e] shone] shon L

Some ranne a good trot

250

With a skellet or a pot

Some fyll theyr pot full

Of good Lemster woll

An huswyfe of trust

Whan she is a ####ab#### thrust

ref.ed: 221

255

Suche a webbe can spyn

Her thryfte is full thyn

¶Some go streyght thyder

Be it slaty or slyder

They holde the hye-waye

260

They [c]are not what men saye care] eare L

Be that as be maye

Some lothe to be espyde

Some start in at the backesyde

Ouer the hedge and pale

265

And all for the good al[e] ale] all L, ale K, D, M

¶Some renne tyll they swete

Brynge wyth them malte or whete

And dame Elynour entrete

To byrle them of the best

270

Than cometh an-other gest

sig: [D2v]

She swered by the rode of Rest

Her lyppes are so drye

Without drynke she must dye

Therefore fyll it by and by

275

And haue here a pecke of ry

¶Anone cometh another

As drye as the other

And with her doth brynge

Mele / salte / or other thynge

280

Her hernest gyrdle / her weddynge-rynge hernest] haruest D, X

To pay for her scot

As cometh to her lot

Some bryngeth her husbandis hood

Bycause the ale is good

285

Another brought her his cap

To offer to the ale-tap

With flaxe and with towe

And some brought sowre dowe

With hey and with howe

290

Syt we downe a ####ab#### rowe

And drynke tyll we blowe

And pype tyrly-tyrlowe

Some layde to pledge

Theyr hatchet and theyr wedge

ref.ed: 222

295

Theyr hekell and theyr rele

Theyr rocke / theyr spynny[n]g-whele spynnyng] spynnyg L

And some went so narrowe

They layde to pledge theyr wharrowe

Theyr rybskyn and theyr spyndell

300

Theyr nedell and theyr thymbell

Here was scant thryft

sig: D3

Whan they made suche shyft

¶Theyr thrust was so great

They asked neuer for mete

305

But drynke styll drynke

And let the cat wynke

Let vs wasshe our gommes

From the drye crommes

Quartus passus

¶Some for very nede

310

Layde downe a skeyne of threde

And some a skeyne of yarne

Some brought from the barne

Both Benes and Pease

Small chaffer doth ease

315

Sometyme / now and than

Another there was that ran

With a good brasse pan

Her colour was full wan

She ran in all the hast

320

Unbrased and vnlast

Tawny swart and sallowe sallowe] swallowe K, D, M

Lyke a cake of tallowe

I swere by all-hallowe

It was a sta[l]e to take stale] stare L, K, D, M, stale X

325

The deuyll in a brake

¶And than came haltyng Ione

And brought a gambone

Of bakon that was resty

But lorde as she was testy

330

Angry as a waspy

She began to yane and gaspy began] gan X

sig: [D3v]

And bad Elynour go bet

And fyll in good met met] meate D, M

ref.ed: 223

It was dere that was far fet

335

¶Another brought a spycke

Of a bacon-flycke

Her tonge was very quycke

But she spake som-what thycke

Her felowe dyd stammer and stut

340

But she was a foule slut

For her mouth fomyd

And her bely groned

Ione sayde she / had eten a fyest

By Chryst sayde she thou lyest

345

I haue as swete a breth

As thou wyth shamefull deth

¶Than Elynour sayde / ye calettes

I shall breke your palettes

Wytho[u]t ye now cease

350

And so was made the dronken peace

Than thydder came dronken Ales

And she was full of tales

Of tydynges in wales

And of saynte Iames in Gales

355

And of the Portyngales

Wyth lo gossyp I ####ab#### wys

Thus and thus it is

There hath ben greate war

Betwene Temple bar

360

And the crosse in chepe

And there came an hepe

Of mylstones in a route

sig: D4

She [spake] thus in her snout spake] speketh L, K, speaketh D, M

Sneuelyng in her nose

365

As though she had the pose

Lo here is an olde typpet

And ye wyll gyue me a syppet

Of your stale ale

God sende you good sale

370

And as she was dr[y]nkynge drynkynge] drnkynge L

She fyll in a wynkynge

With a barly hood

She pyst where she stood

Than began she to wepe

ref.ed: 224

375

And forth-with fell on slepe

Elyno[u]r toke her vp

And blessed her with a cup

Of newe ale in cornes

Ales founde therin no thornes

380

But supped it vp at ones

She founde therein no bones bones] bornes D

Quintus passus.

Nowe in cometh another rabell

First one with a ladell

Another with a cradell

385

And with a syde-sadell

And there began a fabell

A clatterynge and a babell babell] batell X

Of [a] foles fylly a] L, K, D, M omit; fylly] silly M

That had a fole w[i]th wylly with] wfth L

390

With iast you / and gup gylly

She coulde not lye stylly

Then came in a ge[n]et

sig: [D4v]

And sware by saynt Benet

I dranke not this sennet

395

A draught to my pay

Elynour I the pray

Of thyne ale let vs assaye

And haue here a pylche of graye

I were skynnes of conny

400

That causeth I loke so donny

Another than dyd hyche her hyche] hye X

And brought a pottell-pycher

A tonnell / and a bottell

But she had lost the stoppell

405

She cut of her sho-sole

And stopped there with the hole

¶Amonge all the blommer

Another brought a skommer

A fryenge-pan and a slyce

410

Elynour made the pryce

For god ale eche whyt

¶Than sterte in made kyt made] mad K, D, M

ref.ed: 225

That had lytell wyt

She semed somdele seke

415

And brought a peny-cheke brought] brought vp D, M

To dame Elynour

For a draught of [her] lycour her] L, K, D, M omit

¶Than Margery mylke ducke

Her kyrtell she dyd vptucke

420

An y[n]che aboue her kne

Her legges that ye myght se ye] he X

But they were sturdy and stubbed stubbed] stubbled K, D, M

Myghty pestels and clubbed

sig: D5

As fayre and as whyte

425

As the fote of a kyte

She was somwhat foule

Croke-ne[bb]ed lyke an oule Croke nebbed] Croke necked L, K, D, M

And yet she brought her fees

A cantell of Essex chese

430

Was well a fote thycke

Full of magottes quycke

It was huge and greate

And myghty stronge meate

For the deuyll to eate

435

It was tart and punyete

Another sorte of sluttes

Some brought walnuttes

Some apples / some peres

Some brought theyr clyppyng-sheres

440

Some brought this and that

Some brought I wote nere what

Some brought theyr husbands hat

Some podynges and lynkes

Some trypes that stynkes stynkes] stynges K

445

¶But of all this thronge

One came them amonge

She semed halfe a leche

And began to preche

Of the tewsday in the weke

450

Whan the mare doth keke

Of the vertue of an vnset leke

Of her husbandes breke

ref.ed: 226

With the feders of a quale

She could to burdeo[u] sayle burdeou] burde on L, K, bourde on D, M

sig: [D5v]

455

And with good ale-barme

She could make a charme

To helpe with-all a stytch

She semed to be a wytch

Another brought two goslynges

460

That were noughty froslynges

She brought them in a wallet She] Some D, M

She was a cumly callet

The goslenges were vntyde

Elynor began to chyde

465

They be wretchockes thou hast brought They] The D

They are shyre shakyng nought

Se[xt]us

Sextus] Secundus L, K, D, Sextus M

passus.

¶Maude Ruggy / thyther skypped

She was vgly-hypped

And vgly thycke-lypped

470

Like an onyon syded

Lyke tan ledder hyded

She had her so guyded

Betwene the cup and the wall

That she was there-with-all

475

In-to a palsey fall

With that her hed shaked

And her handes quaked

Ones hed wold haue aked

To se her naked

480

She dranke so of the dr[e]gges dregges] dragges L, K, D, dregges M

The dropsy was in her legges

Her face glystryng lyke glas

All foggy fat she was

She had also the gout

sig: [D6]

485

In all her ioyntes about

Her breth was soure and stale

And smelled all of ale

Such a bedfellaw

Wold make one cast his craw

490

But yet for all that

She dranke on the mash-fat

ref.ed: 227

There came an old rybybe

She halted of a kybe

And had broken her shyn

495

At the threshold comyng in

And fell so wyde open

That one might se her token

The deuyll there-on be wroken

What nede all this be spoken

500

She yelled lyke a calfe

Ryse vp on gods halfe

Sayd Elynour Rummyng

I be ####ab#### shrew the for thy cummyng

And as she at her dyd p[lu]ck And] D, M omit; pluck] pulck L

505

Quake / quake / sayd the duck

In that lampatrams lap

With fy / couer thy shap thy] the K, D, M

With sum flyp-flap

God gyue it yll hap

510

Sayd Elynour / for shame

Lyke an honest dame

Up she stert / halfe lame

And skantly could go

For payne and for wo

515

¶In came another dant

sig: [D6v]

With a gose and a gant

She had a wyde wesant wyde] wyse K

She was nothynge plesant

Necked lyke an Olyfa[n]t

520

It was a bullyfant

A gredy cormerant

Another brought her garlyke-heddes

Another brought her bedes

Of Iet or of cole

525

To offer to the ale-pole

Some brought a wymble

Some brought a thymble

Some brought a sylke lace

Some brought a pyncase

530

Some her husbandes gowne

Some a pyllowe of downe

Some of the napery

ref.ed: 228

And all this shyfte they make

For the good ale sake

535

¶A strawe sayde Bele stande vtter

For we haue egges and butter

And of pygeons a payre

¶Than sterte forth a fysgygge

And she brought a bore-pygge

540

The fleshe there-of was ranke

And her brethe strongely stanke

Yet or she went she dranke

And gat her great thanke

Of Elynour for her ware

545

That she thyder bare

To pay for her share

sig: [D7]

Nowe truly to my thynkynge

This is a solempne drynkynge

Septimus passus

¶Soft quod one hyght Sybbyll hyght] high D, M

550

And let me with you bybyll

She sat downe in the place

With a sory face

Whey-wormed about

Garnysshed was her s[n]out

555

With here and there a puscull

Lyke a scabbyd muscull

This ale sayd she is noppy

Let vs syppe and soppy

And not spyll a droppy

560

For so mote I hoppy

It coleth well my croppy croppy] coppy D, M

¶Dame Elyno[u]r sayde she

Haue here is for me

A clout of London pynnes

565

And with that she begynnes

The pot to her plucke

And dranke a good lucke

She swynged vp a quarte swynged] swinge M

At ones for her parte

570

Her paunche was so puffed

ref.ed: 229

And so with ale stuffed

Had she not hyed a ####ab#### pace

She had defoyled the place

¶Tha[n] began the sporte

575

Amonge that dronken sorte

Dame Elynour sayde they

sig: [D7v]

Lende here a cocke of hey

To make all-thynge cleane

Ye wote well what we meane

580

¶But syr amonge all

That sate in that hall

There was a prycke-me-denty

Sat lyke a seynty

And began to paynty

585

As though she wolde faynty

She made it as koye

As a lege-[de]-moy lege de moy] lege moy L, K, lege demoy D, M

She was not halfe so wyse

As she was peuysshe nyse

590

She sayde neuer a worde

But rose from the borde

And called for our dame

Elynour by name

We supposed I ####ab#### wys

595

That she rose to pys

But the very grounde

Was for to compound

With Elynour in the spence

To paye for her expence

600

I haue no penny nor grote

To pay[e] sayde she / god wote paye] payc L

For wasshyng of my throte

But my bedes of amber

Bere them to your chamber

605

¶Than Elynour dyd them hyde

Within her beddes-syde

But some than sate ryght sad

sig: [D8]

That nothynge had

There of their awne

610

Neyther gelt nor pawne

ref.ed: 230

Suche were there menny

That had not a penny

But whan they shulde walke

Were fayne with a chalke

615

To score on the balke

Or score on the tayle

God gyue it yll hayle

For my fyngers ytche fyngers] fynger K

I haue wrytten to mytche

620

Of this mad mummy[n]ge mummynge] mummyge L

Of Elynour Rummynge

Thus endeth the gest

Of this worthy fest.

Q[u]od Skelton Laureat.

¶La[u]r[e]ati

Laureati] Laurrati L

Skeltonidis in despectu malignantium disticon.

QUamuis insanis / quamuis marcescis inanis

Inuidi cantam[u]s / hec loca plena [i]ocis iocis] locis L, K, D, M

¶Bien men souuient.

OMnes (feminas que uel nimis bibule sunt / uel que sordida labe squaloris / aut qua spurca feditatis macula / aut verbosa loqua[c]itateloquacitate] loquatitate L notantur) Poeta inuitat ad audiendum hunc libellum. etc.

sig: [D8v]

Ebria / squalida / sordida femina / prodiga verbis

Huc currat / properet veniat sua gesta libellus

Iste volutabit: pean sua plectra sonando

Materiam risus cantabit carmine rauco

Finis. Quod Skelton Laureat.

¶Thus endethe these lytell workes compyled by mayster Skelton Poet Laureat. And prynted by Rychard Lant / for Henry Tab / dwellyng in Poules churche-yard at the sygne of Iudith